What book or movie do you know backwards and forwards? As John Cusack’s character quips in High Fidelity, “What really matters is what you like, not what you are like.” Plus, one of the easiest ways to bond is through shared interests—like that you can both quote every line from Anchorman or that you both read every book in the Harry Potter series (twice).
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How was your day? It’s basic, but a classic never dies. “First dates are a time to look for commonality between two people,” says Walsh. “By talking about daily activities, as in ‘How was your day?’ you can look for the seed of mutual connection.” And even though this seems so simple, it can often open up the conversation to what they do for a living and for fun.
If you could take a vacation anywhere, where would you go? It’s a surefire way to delve into his interests—especially if his perfect getaway is a tent and yours is a five-star hotel.
What’s the boldest thing you’ve ever done? First dates can make even the most outgoing person a little shy and awkward, but talking about—and looking back on—a time when you were incredibly ballsy can give you a huge boost of confidence.
Spill the details of your worst date ever! While ranting on and on about your horrible ex is not a good idea, it’s fair game to joke about previous first dates or blind dates that went totally awry. After all, that story about the guy who took you to a taco truck and forgot his wallet is just pure conversational gold.
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Are you a cat or a dog person? Hey, it’s important! Plus, a recent studyfound that “dog people” were more energetic and outgoing, while “cat people” were more introverted and sensitive. Talk about a sneaky way to get a read on a person.
What’s your guilty pleasure TV show? Keeping Up With The Kardashians or The Vanilla Ice Project? This is the stuff that deal breakers are made of.
What are you looking for in a relationship? Sure, it’s a little personal, but it’s important to know if you’re on the same page, says Walsh. “I’m a big believer in showing your hand. This saves on misunderstandings, hurt feelings, broken hearts, and plenty of wasted money as one date become ten and only then [do they] reveal [they have] no intention of ever getting married or having kids.”
So, what are your thoughts on cheese? A bit quirky yes, but the vegan in you might not want to get hot and heavy with that platter of Brie he eats every Friday night (or vice versa).